If you ask yourself WHY don't men pay attention to you or don't appreciate you, I have a VERY important truth to tell you:
Leave the man alone, work on yourself.
STOP dreaming about love, create one. Because it starts with you.
It shakes me to my core(!) when I see girls who struggle about men without any effort to understand: the reason is YOU. Admit it; it is as easy as 2*2. You can be the most interesting person in the world, but this NOT how female and male energies operate. If you don't respect your femininity, if you have no idea what men need and how they think, you are simply not ready and I so sorry to say that, but you are not good enough for a relationship you dream about.
WORK. Create yourself, find your voice, know who you are, respect and love yourself FIRST. And only after start thinking about a relationship. But you know what? You won't. Because you will be so happy with yourself, any man will want to be with you so that you can find your true spiritual partner, love, respect, appreciation and next level of GROWTH.
If it sounds too general to you, I have a few practical steps how you can apply this idea to get appreciation, respect, and care we all want to see in relationships:
Before I start, just a quick reminder first lesson of S.P.I.R.I.T formula is open for free, Master your self-love is powerful in helping you build your self-care routine and learn clear, actionable steps to lasting self-love. Join us here for a powerful self-love boost.
1) Understand what men NEED, don't give what you think they need
What does your partner really need? What are his/her deepest dreams and fears? And how you can help him/her to achieve it or overcome it?
I believe before we dive into relationships and give it our heart, we need to, we HAVE TO have a basic understanding of male and female nature. We need to feel, taste, fill our brain with information and insights about how the opposite sex wired. How their brain works, how they renew energy, what fulfills them, what drowns. It is SO important because often these aspects are the OPPOSITE.
What do men NEED to feel more inspired and fulfilled and what do women need?
Have you ever admired men's ability to go where they are aimed to without any doubts and fears, women might sometimes have? Have you ever been charmed by their EXACT understanding of what they want (how can they be so specific??)) and their interesting strategies how to get there? Or their passion when they talk about the goal? If you did, you would agree that one of the greatest qualities of a man is determination.
When a woman achieves her aim she satisfies her ego (which is nice, no doubts here)) but for a man, it is a completely different story. From the energy point of view determination for them is like breathing. Men renew their energy and feel fulfilled when they achieve the goal. That's why they are so determined and ready to sacrifice for what they want.
If you are a woman reading this, let's do a little experiment and feel what it is like for a man to achieve his goal.
Do you remember this feeling after a nice evening with close friends or a hike in the woods after a light rain or a walk around the beautiful lake on a sunny day or time on the beach? Can you picture that now?
This is wonderful, right? Women experience great connection and fulfillment, happiness and joy...We feel renewed, full of energy, inspired.
If I describe the same to a man, he probably will say: "Well... nice, so what? Anyways I don't get how you can spend so long on the beach DOING nothing..."
The keyword for a man is doing. For a woman is feeling. The same principle work in the way we renew our energy. Differently.
For a woman, it could be hard to believe at first, but the same feeling, the same surge of energy, inspiration, clarity, joy we feel after nice time, men experience when they reach their goal. They have such a boost of energy; it helps them to reach their next target. The interesting fact here is that the harder the aim is, the more energy men have!
And it leads us to the next step:
2) Men feel happy when they achieve higher and higher aim
Don't ask yourself why a man doesn't appreciate you enough if you are giving yourself away too fast. What many women do is our natural call to give. Women are wired to give. We try to give love; we crave for ourselves. Love is a necessity for women. But for a man, it's not. They need love as any other human being, but it NOT the most significant for them. Let's admit it and be completely honest. When we try to give too much love too fast, we don't give men an opportunity to aim for and succeed in getting a woman's attention. As cheesy as it sounds, it's a truth.
This works for any person; we value only what we worked hard to get. But for men, this principle is also applied to the relationship, because they unconsciously see aims and goals in everything as this is the way they renew their energy. When we give too much or forget about ourselves we take away energy from a man; we take away one of the most important things for men's happiness - the impulse to achieve.
When a woman loves and values herself first, we give a man more than any love or care can give. Inspiration. Drive. Passion for living your life fully.
"Our first job in life as women is to get to know ourselves. I understood it early, and that's why I was able to do what I did and be who I am." (Michelle Obama)
Don't get me wrong, I truly believe in the power of love and care, not just in romantic, but in any relationships. But, please, it is NOT EVERYTHING. Life is so much more than the comfort of love; it is a bright, diverse and incredibly interesting and challenging journey. As much as love fulfills us, it will never be enough. NEVER. What illusion movies created for us, find your love, be together, and your happiness is settled. It is not true and far away from real life. Real life demand respect, understanding, growth, and many other things. They don't come automatically included in the "love" package. They are what we develop when we learn, explore ourselves and grow.
3) Be an inspiration a man needs
When you develop yourself, your feminine energy, your interests, your outlook, develop your talents and confidence, you give your man a possibility to aim to know you again and aspire to your level every time, to the level of your discoveries inside or outside.
We don't fall in love or marry someone we just like, we fall in love with someone who is better than us. Period.
This is a way to be appreciated. Be a woman any man dreams to see, the one who gives inspiration, who inspires to greater achievements.